Thursday, October 4, 2018

The Blair Squirrel Project

Two weeks ago a squirrel appeared on the railing of the porch at my new job. It stood there, clutching its tiny hands over its chest, chattering and letting out a pained squirrel scream every minute or so. Was it hurt? Was it a mother squirrel whose baby squirrel was missing? Was it the soul of a condemned human spirit forever doomed to travel the world in the body of a black squirrel, unable to communicate with the humans around him? On Friday, the same squirrel appeared on a branch outside my 2nd-storey office window. It stared into my office, screaming at me. When I went to the window it scampered up the branch, then turned to watch me, as if I was supposed to follow. I think I’m living the opening of a horror movie. If I should happen to disappear, please tell the police about the screaming squirrel.


  1. Sounds like the squirrels, like the whales and mice in Hitchhiker's Guide, are trying to warn us of the coming apocalypse. Maybe you should climb that tree?

  2. Try to leave a trail of peanuts so that we can find you (or your remains).

  3. I think you're safe. But I'm scared for the squirrel.

    (I'm forever enchanted by squirrels - we don't have them, of course).

  4. Poor squirrel.

    And Mali -- they are not that wonderful. Think large rats with bushy tails.

  5. Mali, you don't have squirrels?? Just so you know, they never walk. They always do a leaping run. That is, when they're not standing outside Sabine's window, screaming.

  6. Should we call the police and tell them about the screaming squirrel?


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