When I was a kid, my parents ordered a set of encyclopedias. Not Britannica, this was The Encyclopedia of Weird Shit. (That may not have been the name - I can't actually remember the name.) I do remember that I couldn't wait for it to come each month, and dive into the mysteries of spontaneous human combustion or the strange castle in [Wales??] with the hidden room containing the horrifying family secret that is only revealed to male heirs upon their 18th birthday.
I believed all of it. I divulged my knowledge to friends who couldn't care less about the unusual or sublime. I threw my hand up in class to enthusiastically reveal to teachers that houseplants, fed alcohol instead of water, showed evidence of being drunk.
When I was a kid, I believed the written word would not lie to me.
God, I wish you had been in my class at school.
ReplyDeleteThis is fantastic.
ReplyDeleteYour teachers must have loved you.
ReplyDeleteLittle did your parents know they were leading you into a life of true-crime podcasts.
ReplyDeleteRe your last line, me too. Even cereal boxes.
Wow. Everything they all said.
ReplyDeleteI agree with all who commented before me.
ReplyDelete