Tuesday, July 31, 2018

Weird encyclopedia

When I was a kid, my parents ordered a set of encyclopedias. Not Britannica, this was The Encyclopedia of Weird Shit. (That may not have been the name - I can't actually remember the name.) I do remember that I couldn't wait for it to come each month, and dive into the mysteries of spontaneous human combustion or the strange castle in [Wales??] with the hidden room containing the horrifying family secret that is only revealed to male heirs upon their 18th birthday.

I believed all of it. I divulged my knowledge to friends who couldn't care less about the unusual or sublime. I threw my hand up in class to enthusiastically reveal to teachers that houseplants, fed alcohol instead of water, showed evidence of being drunk.

When I was a kid, I believed the written word would not lie to me.

6 comments:

  1. God, I wish you had been in my class at school.

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  2. Your teachers must have loved you.

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  3. Little did your parents know they were leading you into a life of true-crime podcasts.

    Re your last line, me too. Even cereal boxes.

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  4. Wow. Everything they all said.

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  5. I agree with all who commented before me.

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